As I was heading back to Vegas from KC, I was getting into the car rental van and a very nice man helped me with my carry-on bag. The step into the van is a little higher than a usual step and I always need to hold the rail to balance myself. He didn’t make a big deal about it but just took a hold of my bag, lifted it up, and gave me a smile. Of course, I smiled right back and said Thank you.
Courtesy, respect, very nice. He was being a gentleman. It doesn’t happen too often these days. What happened to more of that? It seems that as the ‘women’s lib’ movement came through a lot of the common courtesies and gentlemanly behavior was also swept aside. Now I do believe the movement did some great things for women. It helped to even out the pay scale, it opened awareness of the injustices that were occurring. But like most ‘movements’ the pendulum swayed far left and far right, before it came back to the middle.
As I was writing this in the airplane, my seat partner, Angelique, Angel, and I were having a great discussion. Here’s what we came with about a man being a ‘Gentleman’.
Ladies, when was the last time you saw or experienced the following? (Or men when was the last time you did these things?)
Your car door being opened
Your chair being pulled out
a man rise when you arrive at the table, or when you get up
open the door to the restaurant, or shop
allow you to order first, or wait until you take the first bite at your meal
man walk on the outside of the sidewalk and not the inside
pumping your gas for you
walk beside you and not in front of you
Ladies, when a man does these nice things for you smile, and say Thank you! You are not ‘less’, or weak, or incapable. You are a woman and it is a way that a man shows respect and appreciation. Not only does it not make you ‘less than’, I believe it makes you more. He is showing you that you are important and in that moment is putting you first. You know the Southern adage of ‘Ladies first’. Enjoy it.
My daughter, Alicia and I had a similar conversation this week. She was telling me about a man she is dating and describing many of the above characteristics. She said, He reminds me of Dad. She is right. (Thanks honey!)
Just as a side note, many of these things are basic courtesy, and we can all do for each other. (i.e. let someone go in front of you through a door, or holding the door open for someone…. just saying).
‘Til Next Time –
QUESTION: Do you see many instances of men being Gentlemen?